It all started when I asked Santa Claus for an atom bomb and North Korea started making one. It is amazing how the world terrorist network can communicate with each other despite language differences and other barriers. Even Louis Rukeyser gave me the thumbs up at the end of his show last week on CNBC.

The goal of the plan, (which will be submitted to the senate intelligence committee on a need to know basis) is to simultaneously convince the North Koreans to stop producing conventional weapons of mass destruction, convince Saddam Hussein to resign, and restore self government to much of the world including the US.

I am confident that I speak for the majority of Koreans when I say that I will have their cooperation and support to suggest that they discontinue their nuclear arms program and allow UN inspectors back in if I agree to SIT ON AN ATOMIC BOMB WITH PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH while Dean Becker detonates it from a safe distance.

I am sure that Saddam will offer to resign tenatively.

Millions of Americans are already offering to use restraint, mostly in the form of straps, to secure the presidents' cooperation.

This plan is a wide open democratic plan welcoming line items, suggestions, and side bets.

I strongly suggest settling a lot of other current disagreements at the same time in the interest of environmental protection. Perhaps some one will offer Osama if Americans promise to use this same type of restraint on Dick Cheney.

Activists can help Operation Moron Bomb by creating promises to exercise restraint, and petitions to implement the plan. The media is encouraged to exploit this plan.

It pleases me to use one of George W. Bush's favorite words to say that implementation of this plan would render the president immaterial.

This plan is for the public to use and is a utility. It is in fact a product of the world community of intelligence which is the community of civilized humans that protect intelligence itself by communicating beyond the barriers of regional propaganda. Kinda like smoke signals.

Not to be confused with the intelligence community which is the community of various government agencies that keep secrets. Real intelligence, as in the form so desperately needed by the civilized world, is also a public utility. This utility should serve by helping all people recognize a contact, and verify information. Intelligence is in fact a form of communication and is the ability to communicate.

Happy new year,
Albert Kada
Independent Terrorist Journalist