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Vinegar and Brown Paper

Yakoub Islam | 26.08.2004 22:37 | Analysis | Anti-racism | Free Spaces

How easy is it to breach to Terrorism Act? To test the waters, Yakoub Islam has decided to set up a blog detailing his plans to commit a minor act of terrorism outside Parliament sometimes in the near future. MI5 have already been notified of the blog via their website.

Dear friends

In protest at the 30 000 raids carried out by Britain's security services on Muslim homes, which have resulted in only 100 terrorism charges - some of which are viewed with scepticism by British Muslims - and only THREE Muslims convicted of terrorist related offences, I have decided to become a terrorist.

Muslim Terrorist Blog
"Yakoub Islam, being of sound mind, hereby proclaims his intention to intimidate a section of the public, for the purpose of advancing an ideological cause, in breach of Part 1 of the Terrorism Act, 2000. To wit, it is his intent to maliciously and wilfully explode a jar of pickle onions outside the Houses of Parliament in London, England, with the intent to spread fear and panic amongst English people who enjoy ploughman's lunches. May the Lord have mercy on his soul."

The above blog will detail the planning and execution of this terrorism attack.

I understand that those who have been victims of terrorism, even indirectly, may be outraged by my intention to recklessly explode a jar of perfectly good pickled onions in a public place. It is, however, not my intention to offend such people, all of whom have my deepest sympathy, nor do I hope to win affection for murderers who pose by the pseudonym terrorist. My single aim is to lampoon the British government for its inexcusably crass policing policies, which have seriously contributed to the demonization of my religious community.

I will of course refrain from spreading vinegar mayhem in the Capital, should David Blunkett choose to bow to my threat and cease ingesting ploughman's lunches at the Home Office forthwith.


Yakoub Islam
Tasneem Project

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Display the following 6 comments

  1. Terrorists Handbook — nowar
  2. terrorists r us — dh
  3. handbook — MI5 sucks
  4. Financial Advice — Accidental Terrorist
  5. Good work — Shane
  6. The Anarchist Cookbook is Fake — spunk