Government safety advice

In the wake of the attacks on the WTC and in the light of recent terrorist activities the government has issued the following safety advice:
1: Look both ways before boarding a plane
2: Wash your hands thoroughly before breathing
3: Do not handle any suspicious looking muslims or if in doubt iron them first.
The government would also like to stress that although there has been a rush of people buying eye-wool and booking holes in the sand for their heads these provide no real protection and the public should wait until the government supplies them first.