Last month for some bizarre reason and email appeared in circas in box from a car advertiser asking the clown army to take part in a new ad for a citroen car - Kolonel Klepto respondes to their stupidity
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circalondon@piper.riseup.net
Delivered-To: riseup+ circalondon@piper.riseup.net
X-Sender: artactivism@pop.gn.apc.org
see request then my answer from klepto below
Hi Circa!
My name is Lucy and I am a production manager for a tv commercial
production
company called Academy.
I am currently working on a Citroen spot with the director Jonathan Glazer
(Sexy Beast, Birth, Guinness 'Surfer' etc - his work can be viewed on our
website www.academyfilms.com) which involves a live action, cartoon
fight...
I have attached the script, but, in brief, the idea is that two men, a
chauffeur and his employer, fight over who drives the car.
The fight will take the form of a cartoon fight with swirling clouds of
movement; big punches and flailing limbs which will be shot for real with
no
animation.
So hopefully it is getting a little more obvious why I am contacting
you...
We are looking for someone to choreograph these moves and thought this,
perhaps, could be something you would be interested in. Similarly we are
looking to cast these roles and again thought you may be able to help.
The shoot would take place in France at the end of September/beginning of
October but would also include a bit of prep time beforehand both in
London
and France.
As I mentioned I have attached the script along with the directors
treatment. Initial director's storyboard to follow.
Should this be something that you would be interested in, it would be
great
to talk to you guys in a bit more depth.
I can be contacted on 0207 395 4155 or via email at this address.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Many thanks,
Lucy Gossage
Production Manager
Academy Productions
Tel: 0207 395 4155
Mob: 07803 755 366
www.academyfilms,com
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Date: Fri, 23 Sep 2005 13:23:02 -0000 (GMT)
Subject: Re: 'Clown' Choreographer/Actor Wanted
From: circa@riseup.net
To: "lucy gossage"
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dear lucy
thankyou for your wonderful offer to get us to help promote the motor car
- we at circa are so excite ˆ you see clowns love cars - especially little
ones which we can all squeeze into and then fall out of - again and again
- normally our cars are made of badly painted cardboard that falls apart
in the rain.....
But you seem to be wanting us to help sell beautiful shinny metal cars ˆ
ooohhh ahhhhh ˆ big hard ones that drive very fast and need special tarmac
roads ( rather than circus rings) ∑. So exciting ˆ so glamorous these
beautiful stylish cars that run children over splitting their skulls, or
breaking their spines in two !!! Are we really going to help sell Big BIG
important sexy cars that hit other cars and bicycles and cause huge bloody
accidents with guts and brains splattered in very un clown like ways
across the tarmac !
We are always suprised at CIRCA that despite the fact that cars kill over
a million people every year, they are not seen as terrorising our
communities like those horrible people that you see on the TV all the time
with planes and rucksacks as weapons!!! We are also always perturbed at
the fact that cars are still promoted by lovely „arty „advertisers as
desirable and fashionable objects ˆ despite the fact that they are major
contributors to global warming which as we are seeing with the hurricanes,
heat waves and floods is going to kill and destroy more and more things
every year ˆ even our lovely government has claimed ( and never acted on
) that global warming is „ a greater global threat than terrorism‰.
But maybe you like droughts and deserts and watching the flood waters rise
and maybe you think these are beautiful things, dramatic and powerful
images of modernity ˆ just like the cars you work so so so hard to sell to
people who are mostly in debt and cant even afford them.
Maybe it‚s the fact that cars need so much oil that you like ˆ that
glistening shinny black stuff, all slippery and sexy and sensual that
gushes out of the ground like a huge explosive orgasmic torrent∑.. to us
clowns it reminds us of those wonderful cream pie fights all dripping and
gooieeeee -- its just such a shame that with oil comes more pollution,
indigenous people getting cancer, jungles turned to toxic waste, lots of
lakes dying and river and sea life disappearing and of course oils
favourite partner in crime WAR !! Its such a shame that those lovely
American soldiers killed 140,000 people in Iraq and still cant get the oil
they went for in the first place flowing faster than the blood ˆ OH dear
what are we going to put in our nice shinny cars with less and less oil
around∑..
Maybe its just that you hate local shops and want more and more malls and
out of town supermarkets to ravage our countryside all especially designed
for the great car economy∑ we clowns despite our big shoes spend most of
our time walking and on bicycles ˆ which are so energy efficient and a lot
more sexy than those silly death machines that will one day be laughed at
by history for being the most ridiculous way to go from a to b and the
most destructive bits of metal every invented ( apart from missiles and
bullets of course ˆ which do tend to be friendly with cars as they more
often than not are involved in oil wars !)
Maybe lucy ˆ this is all a joke and you really do care about the future of
the planet and our or maybe even your children ( I hope they don‚t have
asthma ˆ another lovely gift that cars bring them) ∑
Once upon a time there was the slave trade ˆ many people refused to work
for companies that supported it ˆ they believed that human rights were
more important than profit and they realised that to work for what is
wrong is wrong and to support violence is not a nice thing at all..
Please think about all this ˆ please go home tonight and do some research
into the effect of cars and oil on our lives and please look in the mirror
in the morning ˆ look deep into your eyes ( eye contact is key for
clowning ) and try to say to your self ˆ„ I‚m doing the right thing∑‰
Dear lucy ˆ thanks for the offer but we would never help promote such a
stupid thing ˆ we love to be stupid but our stupidity is based on dignity
and love and a deep respect for human beings and the planet, unfortunately
being part of the advertising industry does not seem to match up to our
desires ∑.
yours kolonel Klepto
--
circalondon@piper.riseup.net Delivered-To: riseup+
circalondon@piper.riseup.net X-Sender:
artactivism@pop.gn.apc.org see request then my answer from klepto below
Hi Circa!
My name is Lucy and I am a production manager for a tv commercial
production
company called Academy.
I am currently working on a Citroen spot with the director Jonathan Glazer
(Sexy Beast, Birth, Guinness 'Surfer' etc - his work can be viewed on our
website www.academyfilms.com) which involves a live action, cartoon
fight...
I have attached the script, but, in brief, the idea is that two men, a
chauffeur and his employer, fight over who drives the car.
The fight will take the form of a cartoon fight with swirling clouds of
movement; big punches and flailing limbs which will be shot for real with
no
animation.
So hopefully it is getting a little more obvious why I am contacting
you...
We are looking for someone to choreograph these moves and thought this,
perhaps, could be something you would be interested in. Similarly we are
looking to cast these roles and again thought you may be able to help.
The shoot would take place in France at the end of September/beginning of
October but would also include a bit of prep time beforehand both in
London
and France.
As I mentioned I have attached the script along with the directors
treatment. Initial director's storyboard to follow.
Should this be something that you would be interested in, it would be
great
to talk to you guys in a bit more depth.
I can be contacted on 0207 395 4155 or via email at this address.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Many thanks,
Lucy Gossage
Production Manager
Academy Productions
Tel: 0207 395 4155
Mob: 07803 755 366
www.academyfilms,com
X-Original-To:
artactivism@gn.apc.org Delivered-To:
artactivism@gn.apc.org Date: Fri, 23 Sep 2005 13:23:02 -0000 (GMT)
Subject: Re: 'Clown' Choreographer/Actor Wanted
From:
circa@riseup.net To: "lucy gossage"
X-Priority: 3 (Normal)
Importance: Normal
X-Virus-Scanned: by amavisd-new-20030616-p10 (Debian) at riseup.net
X-Virus-Scanned: by amavisd-new at gn.apc.org
X-Spam-Status: No, hits=1.7 tagged_above=-999.0 required=3.9 tests=AWL,
NO_REAL_NAME, RCVD_IN_BL_SPAMCOP_NET
X-Spam-Level: *
Status: O
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X-Keywords:
dear lucy
thankyou for your wonderful offer to get us to help promote the motor car
- we at circa are so excite ˆ you see clowns love cars - especially little
ones which we can all squeeze into and then fall out of - again and again
- normally our cars are made of badly painted cardboard that falls apart
in the rain.....
But you seem to be wanting us to help sell beautiful shinny metal cars ˆ
ooohhh ahhhhh ˆ big hard ones that drive very fast and need special tarmac
roads ( rather than circus rings) ∑. So exciting ˆ so glamorous these
beautiful stylish cars that run children over splitting their skulls, or
breaking their spines in two !!! Are we really going to help sell Big BIG
important sexy cars that hit other cars and bicycles and cause huge bloody
accidents with guts and brains splattered in very un clown like ways
across the tarmac !
We are always suprised at CIRCA that despite the fact that cars kill over
a million people every year, they are not seen as terrorising our
communities like those horrible people that you see on the TV all the time
with planes and rucksacks as weapons!!! We are also always perturbed at
the fact that cars are still promoted by lovely „arty „advertisers as
desirable and fashionable objects ˆ despite the fact that they are major
contributors to global warming which as we are seeing with the hurricanes,
heat waves and floods is going to kill and destroy more and more things
every year ˆ even our lovely government has claimed ( and never acted on
) that global warming is „ a greater global threat than terrorism‰.
But maybe you like droughts and deserts and watching the flood waters rise
and maybe you think these are beautiful things, dramatic and powerful
images of modernity ˆ just like the cars you work so so so hard to sell to
people who are mostly in debt and cant even afford them.
Maybe it‚s the fact that cars need so much oil that you like ˆ that
glistening shinny black stuff, all slippery and sexy and sensual that
gushes out of the ground like a huge explosive orgasmic torrent∑.. to us
clowns it reminds us of those wonderful cream pie fights all dripping and
gooieeeee -- its just such a shame that with oil comes more pollution,
indigenous people getting cancer, jungles turned to toxic waste, lots of
lakes dying and river and sea life disappearing and of course oils
favourite partner in crime WAR !! Its such a shame that those lovely
American soldiers killed 140,000 people in Iraq and still cant get the oil
they went for in the first place flowing faster than the blood ˆ OH dear
what are we going to put in our nice shinny cars with less and less oil
around∑..
Maybe its just that you hate local shops and want more and more malls and
out of town supermarkets to ravage our countryside all especially designed
for the great car economy∑ we clowns despite our big shoes spend most of
our time walking and on bicycles ˆ which are so energy efficient and a lot
more sexy than those silly death machines that will one day be laughed at
by history for being the most ridiculous way to go from a to b and the
most destructive bits of metal every invented ( apart from missiles and
bullets of course ˆ which do tend to be friendly with cars as they more
often than not are involved in oil wars !)
Maybe lucy ˆ this is all a joke and you really do care about the future of
the planet and our or maybe even your children ( I hope they don‚t have
asthma ˆ another lovely gift that cars bring them) ∑
Once upon a time there was the slave trade ˆ many people refused to work
for companies that supported it ˆ they believed that human rights were
more important than profit and they realised that to work for what is
wrong is wrong and to support violence is not a nice thing at all..
Please think about all this ˆ please go home tonight and do some research
into the effect of cars and oil on our lives and please look in the mirror
in the morning ˆ look deep into your eyes ( eye contact is key for
clowning ) and try to say to your self ˆ„ I‚m doing the right thing∑‰
Dear lucy ˆ thanks for the offer but we would never help promote such a
stupid thing ˆ we love to be stupid but our stupidity is based on dignity
and love and a deep respect for human beings and the planet, unfortunately
being part of the advertising industry does not seem to match up to our
desires ∑.
yours kolonel Klepto
--
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