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All men are responsible for stopping male violence against women

Utopia Bold | 07.12.2006 05:18 | Gender | Social Struggles | World

All men, both violent and non violent are responsible for stopping male violence against women because globally, men as a group hold more power than women.

All men are responsible for stopping male violence against women
by Utopia Bold

Men may feel unease when male violence against women is addressed including non-violent men. However, all men, both violent and non-violent, must be held responsible for stopping male violence against women.
Violent men must stop assaulting women. Non-violent men must not sit by and allow male violence against women to continue. Their inaction-or indifference- is passive male violence against women. Breaking the silence by naming an atrocity is the first step in ending it. Male violence against women must be named specifically.
To maintain patriarchy, "Women's agony at the hands of men must never be revealed. If women steadfastly and courageously began to tell the truth and would not stop, would not be co-opted, would not become afraid, the truth of our enslavement would be undeniable and the jig would be up" —from "Telling the Truth" by Sonia Johnson.
Women, who outnumber men, are the single largest group of oppressed humans on the planet. Men have oppressed women nonstop for the longest length of time of any oppressed group, more than 5,000 years (The Chalice and the Blade by Riane Eisler). A woman once told me that dealing with male violence "was just part of being a woman!
I don't understand why many people-especially women-resist holding all men responsible for male violence against women. Here are some popular evasions:
1. "Not all men are violent" No one said they were. Since men collectively hold more power than women, non-violent men are also responsible for stopping male violence against women.
2. "Women are violent too" Two wrongs don't make a right. However, as usual, women are blamed for their own degradation. As Mary Daly wrote in her book Pure Lust, (p.365) " Within the Virulent State of phallocracy, women have been attacked and divided against our Selves. From the earliest times of the patriarchy, countless mothers have been broken and the resulting broken daughters have carried on the chain of fragmentation. . . They have been reduced to responding to the fettered/fathered urge to reproduce their altered–that is, patriarchally identified selves –in an endless circle of Self destruction. Such forcible altered women have appeared to be normal within the man made milieu."
Also, female violence pales in comparison to male violence. Men commit 88 percent of violent crime (US Bureau of Justice statistics). Women don't build rape camps to torture and molest men to death. Women don't control the U.S. government which spends half a trillion dollars a year on mass murder (war). Globally, women can't walk alone without the possibility of men assaulting them. The reverse is not true.
Even though some broken women may collaborate with patriarchal men to gain power (Condi Rice, Margaret Thatcher etc.) it doesn't change the fact that patriarchal men are in charge and allow selected token "henchwomen" into the boys club–if they identify with and behave like patriarchal men.
3. “Violence is a human problem affecting both sexes”
Mary Daly calls this tactic “universalism.” Muddying the waters, it dilutes the specific focus on male violence against women by making it a gender neutral, universal human issue. It’s another version of “women are violent too.”
4. The absent referent The "absent referent" refers to something without naming it. (See Neither Man Nor Beast by Carol Adams p.16-17). Mary Daly in her book Quintessence wrote, "Naming the agent is required for an adequate analysis of atrocities. Timid terms such as "sexual violence," "domestic violence" "gender-based violence," and "violence" don’t name men as the perpetrators. Even Amnesty International, which calls it "a global scourge," uses the term "violence against women" instead of "male violence against women." (
5. Men also rape men and boys This doesn’t change the fact that in every nation on earth, in all levels of society, men rape women. Rape is a male hate crime against women. Men who rape women have contempt for women and want to degrade them. Even when men rape males, contempt for women is the underlying issue. Men rape males to degrade them by treating them like raped women.
6. The duality argument Supposedly, opposing something directly "gives it more power." If racism and sexism were not opposed directly in the U.S., blacks would still be slaves and women would still be men's property, unable to vote, own a business or keep their own wages. If the Nazis were not opposed directly, they would now run the world.
7. Passive grammar Instead of the active voice using the passive voice (women were raped by men) instead of the active voice (men raped the women) shifts the focus from the perpetrators and their actions (men doing the raping) to their victims (the women being raped).
8. "Boys will be boys" Patriarchal cultures promote "nature over nurture" (biological determinism). Supposedly, men are "naturally violent." This legitimizes and perpetuates war and men's abuse of women. Abnormal violent "manhood" is regarded as the norm.
Men are naturally peaceful. Archaeological evidence shows men enjoyed and maintained 1,500 years of peace in ancient Crete! It's proven today by many non-violent men. It takes traumatic conditioning to make men violent. "Military training camps, police academies and even some self-defense pros are constantly searching for more effective methods of suppressing the human revulsion to taking human life." - The Science of Creating Killers
9. "Societies were always patriarchal and men have always dominated women"
Marija Gimbutas, the world renowned archaeologist who wrote Goddesses and Gods of Old Europe unearthed relics that prove men didn't always dominate women and that women and men once shared power in peaceful non-patriarchal Goddess worshipping societies. Riane Eisler's book The Chalice and the Blade cites many more instances proving this.
Types of Male Violence against women
Modern patriarchal cultures are maintained by contempt for and abuse of women. Male violence against women in the media, men's requirement for emaciated super models and life threatening cosmetic surgery, mandated pregnancy in most nations, and billions spent on violent degrading pornography confirm this. Feeling contempt for women makes it easier for violent men to abuse them.
Reproductive male violence against women (Mandated pregnancy)
Male supremacist governments force women to have children they don't want or can't care for by denying women birth control or abortion.
Spiritual male violence against women Male supremacist religions claim men have the right to control women. Men coerce women to have children by telling women birth control or abortion is "sinful" and that "children are sent from god" etc.
Men wrote all the scriptures of all the organized religions, so "god's" agenda is men's agenda. Since the "words of god" are actually the "words of men, men don't "play god" they ARE "god," as illustrated by the following examples of male authored cosmic ca ca:
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your husbands, for the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church.”— Ephesians 5:23-24.
“I thank thee O lord, that thou has not created me a heathen, a slave, or a woman.” – Orthodox Jewish prayer.
"God formed her body to belong to a man, to have and to rear children. Let them bear children till they die of it."— Martin Luther.
"In pain shall you bear children, yet your urge will be for your husband, and he shall rule over you."— Genesis 3:16.
"Your women are fields to cultivate, so go to your fields as you will!" –Koran 2:223.
Physical male violence against women
Being battered by men is the number one "health" problem of women in the US (U.S. surgeon general). Men batter 12% of pregnant woman, causing 17% of birth defects (March of Dimes). Seventy-five percent of women murdered during domestic violence are killed by men after they leave them. (U.S Dept. of Justice-Bureau of Justice Statistics).
Since 1993, men raped and murdered more than 320 women in Juárez, Mexico. Approximately 100 were sexual-torture killings; 450 more women are missing. Men travel to Juarez to hunt, rape and murder women. (
Economic male violence against women women in most parts of the world are paid less than men for the same work-if they're paid at att.
Educational male violence against women Men in Afghanistan kill women who teach girls to read (Feminist Majority Foundation Most of the world's illiterate people are women.
Medical and psychological male violence against women The male dominated medical profession has prescribed shock treatment, psychoactive drugs, lobotomies, life threatening diets, dangerous cosmetic surgery and other “therapies” to tame wild women and make them acceptable to men.
Silence is Complicity
Collectively, men hold more power than women, so all men are responsible for stopping male violence against women. Increasing numbers of men are opposing this atrocity in various ways.
For example, some men in Los Angeles organize demonstrations and march against male violence against women wearing high heels. Their banner reads, “Walk A MIle In Their Shoes.” Other men write articles against male violence. In Bob Herbert's 10/16/06 New York Times article "Why aren't we shocked?" he wrote, "We have become so accustomed to living in a society saturated with misogyny that violence against females is more or less to be expected."
Each man must look into his heart and ask himself what he can do to stop male violence against women. Speaking out is the first step.
Men against male violence against women
Here are a few men’s web sites. A google search will find many more. - men against sexual violence. men against sexual assault - men united against sexual assault - men against violence webring

Utopia Bold


women were the victims in about 85% of domestic violence

10.12.2006 19:55


Women abuse men just as often as men abuse women.


Although boys and men are more likely to be victimized by a stranger or causal acquaintance, research has found that women are more likely than men to be victimized by a family member or an intimate partner.[5] In the case of childhood sexual abuse, studies consistently show that the vast majority of perpetrators are male, regardless of the sex of the victim.[6] Domestic violence is primarily a crime against women by their male partners. In the US, in 1998, women were the victims in about 85% of domestic violence cases and they represented 72% of the victims of murders committed by intimate partners.[7] In domestic violence situations, when women use violence, it is usually in self-defense. Furthermore, aggressions perpetrated by men tend to be more severe and harmful than those perpetrated by women.[8] As Heise et al point out, (the fact that women are often emotionally invo l ved with and financially dependent upon those who abuse them has profound implications for how women experience violence and how best to intervene.)[9]

Reality Check

98% of sexual offenders, 80% of criminals are male

10.12.2006 20:19

Men outnumber women across all major crime categories. Between 83 and 94 per cent of offenders found guilty of burglary, robbery, drug offences, criminal damage or violence against the person were male. Although the number of offenders was relatively small, 98 per cent of those found guilty of or cautioned for sexual offences were male.

UK Stats


Display the following 121 comments

  1. Unevidenced "truths" — evidence seeker
  2. All people are responsible for stopping male violence — bob
  3. This article is very single-sided — yohan
  4. How about women stopping female violence against men? — Wes
  5. Women are more frequently physically violent than men. — nigelsuper400
  6. Are women physically and emotionally handicapped in the some way? — Prasutagus
  7. asking for it — bob
  8. Violent women, reply to Bob — yohan
  9. Interesting...rather dictatorial though. — Utopia- Yes Please.
  10. yohan — bob
  11. Someone needs to go outside and take a look around — Isaac
  12. Is there any American boy who was not taught to "Never hit a girl"? — Don, the 14%er
  13. Re: asking for it — Prasutagus
  14. Let the excuses continue — Utopia Bold
  15. Women are responsible for their own violence. — nigelsuper400
  16. Utopia ? super — bob
  17. What a load of hate male — Andrew Steiger
  18. Let the excuses continue Part 2 (Utopia Bold) — yohan
  19. Promotes violence against men - will not stop violence against women — Happy Bullet
  20. Laws are based on a false assumption — yohan
  21. Feminism= politically correct bigotry — Balls and a cock and not a person
  22. Resignation to an existance of segregation — MyGran
  23. burning times — bob
  24. Splutter! — Primary sexual organs
  25. Men are earning more? Please explain... — yohan
  26. ishtar — Bollocks
  27. just like your father, but much worse — Diana
  28. the continuing gender pay gap — Kali
  29. He is asking for it — HECATI
  30. hate patriarchy- love people — Queers Without Borders
  31. burning times with doublespeak. — Andrew Steiger
  32. Pay Gap (by Kali) — yohan
  33. Queers without wars ? — Inanna
  34. Gender pay gap doesn't exist... — MyGran
  35. Sexist Sterotypes — Prasutagus
  36. alot of biased views — masked bandit
  37. walking the walk — bob-goddess
  38. Violence Against Women — Paul Clements
  39. Fantastic article. — Heretic
  40. Becomming what you hate? — James Staines
  41. , — thanatos
  42. Disgusted by your comment — Chandra Niklewski
  43. No solutions here. I — gwallan
  44. No solutions here II — gwallan
  45. No solutions offered III — gwallan
  46. Still no solutions — gwallan
  47. Pure misandry — gwallan
  48. XSryder — xsryder
  49. When Society Becomes An Addict: Anne WIlson Schaef — Robert Gartner
  50. RE: "Stats" Addition — Robert Gartner
  51. Proof of oppression — dan
  52. Flaws in understanding stats — dan
  53. 4th Prostitute Missing - top BBC story — dan
  54. Witch hunts and stats — gwallan
  55. Flawed Logic — Male Logic
  56. the article was on male on female violence — dan
  57. women and men — *unequal physically, biologically, psychologically and culturally.
  58. Stats, stats and more stats — Andrew Steiger
  59. Equal under God ess — dan
  60. Even little infants are not safe from Utopia Blind. — Andrew Steiger
  61. All women are responsible for stopping female violence against children! — Don, the 14%er
  62. “current inequality” — Female Logic
  63. Is someone confused, with nonchalance. — Andrew Steiger
  64. Utopia in wonderland comparison test — Fuzzy Logic
  65. Dan's strange judgements as a feminist — yohan
  66. boy racers and girl beaters — dan
  67. 200 million women 'missing' from the planet — dan
  68. belittling Yohan — dan
  69. Dan, you should have written the article we're discussing — Neil
  70. Myths — Rizla
  71. Feminist propaganda — Robert
  72. Barbwire — Gary Lentz
  73. Neil — dan
  74. Rizla, Robert, Gary — dan
  75. to bob — Hans Side
  76. Iraq - Martial Arts - DV - Missing Women - Your Thoughts — Neil
  77. Dan — Robert
  78. white horses — dan
  79. Equality when it suits — Non-Extremist
  80. Before I go... — Neil
  81. Riz, Neil — dan
  82. My plans to rule the world — Neil
  83. inequitable violence — dan
  84. Title — Anna Theseology
  85. Dan's comments.... — yohan
  86. anticipate — dan
  87. SCUM manifesto — dan
  88. I need some help — Rizla
  89. SCUM manifesto — Rizla
  90. take the compliment — dan
  91. title of this comment — Author information
  92. Bob-Dan's views on violence and responsibility — Yohan
  93. PLEASE help us to stop violence against women... — dan
  94. caveat emptor! — Eyes, nose, nackers and shins
  95. Nice Dan — Robert
  96. High testosterone — Gaia
  97. When's it right to hit a woman? — Neil
  98. But — Eva
  99. Neil, Eva — dan
  100. “It is always better to use techniques to avoid or diffuse trouble” — Reducing the risks
  101. Some questions — Eva
  102. Reducing the risks — Eva
  103. Dan — Rizla
  104. Are these your pants ? — dan
  105. more — Eva
  106. Couldn't agree more. — Eva
  107. Are you going to make the Reclaim the Night then ? — dan
  108. Eva, what is the best way to deal with an abusive man ? — dan
  109. Never ever do nothing, but tread carefully! — Eva
  110. Because the night [doesn't] belong to [haters] — Eva
  111. Hitchers & White Ribbons — dan
  112. Self-defence Dan — Yohan
  113. Yohan — dan
  114. Violent living area (for Dan) — Yohan
  115. Scotland compared to Japan — dan
  116. Poor Japanese women? (Dan) — Yohan
  117. Hiroko Sato — dan
  118. Waging a war against men won't help — Dan Fac
  119. Dan, dan and the universe — Andrew Steiger
  120. So I just read this rubbish... — Teegan
  121. Some things.... — Teegan