A great beer is something truly sacred. Last night I had a few glasses of Dab (brewed in Dortmund under the Rheinheitsgebot purity laws of 1516). It really was something special.

Now I'd never heard of Manuel II Palaeologus, before the Pope dropped a bollock and offended a few million muslims.

But I'm just so bored by all the predictable reactions.

The Islamic faith prohibits the consumption of alcohol. In mosques around the country beer is denounced. In some Islamic states beer drinkers are incarcerated, even floggged.

This suppression and persecution is highly offensive to millions of beer-drinkers around the world.

It's about time that Beer Fundamentalists started playing the Righteous Indignation Game just like Islamofascists do. On behalf of the British Council of Beerdrinkers I insist that muslim leaders apologise immediately for offensive comments they have made about beer over the past thirteen centuries. And I demand all beer drinkers held in Islamic prisons should be released immediately.