Key one, key three, hold for twenty minutes and listen to Julio Inglesias?

Could be talking to the council, could just be trying to find out how to book a cheap train?

Well GetHuman are trying to build up a database of cheats to get round this. It's already huge in the US, but it's only got about 20 listings here and needs help to find more.

Check out  http://gethuman.com/uk to help them do it.

And just in case there's one person who still doesn't know...BUG ME NOT!

Ever wanted to look at a week-old article in an online newspaper but they force you to "log in"? Why bother spending half a day giving them personal information they've no right to know?

Go to  http://www.bugmenot.com

Chances are they'll share details that'll get in you in right away.