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Who Did It?

Jon Chance | 20.04.2002 22:44

The Citizens Executive Administration (CEA-USA) is recruiting a new Secretary of Defense. Are you qualified?

Mother Nature demands that the Citizens Executive
Administration (CEA) re-appoint a highly qualified
Secretary of Defense.

The CEA's previous Secretary of Defense has taken the
position as Vice President: He's a very mean fella
living up North in a cave and prefers to remain
anonymous.

(Long ago, Woodrow Harrelson's lawyer informed us that
Woody couldn't accept the appointment. Most of his
assets hadn't yet been moved to safe havens, and
Woody's already entwined in silly legal problems.)

The CEA will consider any seasoned soldier who knows
who's responsible for this morning's Northeast
earthquake.

Obviously the clutzy 9-11 terrorists, Paul Wolfowitz &
Associates, know little about natural law. Do you?


Morning Rumble

5.1 Magnitude Earthquake Rattles Northeast, Felt From
Maine to Maryland

By Verena Dobnik
The Associated Press

N E W Y O R K, April 20 — An earthquake felt from
Maine to Maryland rattled the Northeast on this
morning with a magnitude of 5.1, according to the U.S.
Geological Survey.

The earthquake hit just before 7 a.m. about 15 miles
southwest of Plattsburgh, in northern New York near
the Vermont and Canadian borders.

There were no immediate reports of injuries, but the
Vermont State Police received calls about cracked
foundations and broken windows, and sections of at
least two roads collapsed near the epicenter in
upstate New York.

Sandy Caligiore, of Lake Placid, about 35 miles
southwest of Plattsburgh, said he felt the shaking for
about 30 seconds. It was so strong, decorations were
falling off the walls, he said.

"I was getting out of the shower and the mirror was
shaking. The whole house was shaking," said Darlene
Conklin, who lives in Hopewell Junction, about 60
miles north of New York City. "My husband was watching
TV, and he felt the couch shaking. You could see the
doors shaking, the walls trembling."

‘Moderate’ Quake

The earthquake was recorded at 6:50 a.m., said William
Ott, a seismologist at Weston Observatory at Boston
College.

He said the quake was "moderate." A typical 5.1
earthquake would cause cracked plaster, broken windows
and minor structural damage around the epicenter, he
said.

"There are faults all over the northeastern United
States," Ott said. "They're not as active as the ones
in California, but they're capable of producing
earthquakes of this size from time to time."

The largest earthquake recorded in New York, according
to the USGS, was a 5.8 magnitude quake in 1944 that
was centered in Massena, about 3 miles from the
Canadian border.

Won Young Kim, a seismologist with Columbia
University's Lamont Doherty Earth Observatory, said
there was a magnitude 5.2 quake in 1993, about 50
miles south of Saturday's epicenter. He said a
magnitude 3.5 quake occurred just south of Plattsburgh
on April 20, 2000.

Reports of the shaking today came from as far away as
Baltimore, Toronto and Portland, Maine. The USGS
National Earthquake Information Center measured the
earthquake's depth at 3.1 miles.

Kathleen Morrow, 31, of Northfield, in central
Vermont, said the jolt woke her husband up and the
shaking continued for several seconds.

"I had my feet on the floor ready to leave the house
if it was going to be continuing or stronger," she
said.

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Jon Chance
- e-mail: jpchance@egroups.com
- Homepage: egroups.com/group/jpchance