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4 simple steps to solving the debt crisis

Ron F | 11.11.2001 11:36

For the numerous countries whose economies, education, health and welfare provision have been completely wrecked by massive debt repayments to western governments and financial institutions Pakistan represents an excellent role model for solving the problem

Here's how -

1 - Support as many terrorist groups and brutal regimes as possible. In Pakistan's case, two was sufficient, namely the Taleban in Afghanistan and the Islamic groups in Kashmir, busy slaughtering and being slaughtered by Indian troops in the disputed territory. It may help if the groups supported show complete contempt for basic human rights and if the arms supplied come from "civilized" countries like nuclear armed Israel.

2 - Waste your countries resources and threaten the environment and regional stability by secretly developing your own nuclear weapons, then surprise the world by testing them.

3 - Democratically elect a parliamentary government, then let the military overthrow it and install a completely unaccountable dictatorship and have a General declare himself "President for life".

4 - The hard part - wait for a global superpower with complete contempt for international law to declare, following the biggest investigation in human history and with no tangible evidence, that your neighbour just attacked it.

And that's it. Debt cancelled, $1 billion in loans approved, military regime secured, sanctions lifted and weapons sales back on stream.

While Ken Kesey (RIP) will be sorely missed, let's face it, in a world this twisted who needs fiction?

Ron F