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'Oil On Mars' Probe Creates Worries That The VP Really Is THAT Fucking Stupid

Deivid's Thang | 29.06.2001 22:58

Vice-president Dick Cheney announced today that he would be heading a brave new resource assessment committee that will probe the possibility of beginning US oil drilling on the planet Mars by as soon as 2003.....

'Oil On Mars' Probe Creates Worries That The VP Really Is THAT Fucking Stupid
'Oil On Mars' Probe Creates Worries That The VP Really Is THAT Fucking Stupid


Vice-president Dick Cheney announced today that he would be heading a brave new resource assessment committee that will probe the possibility of beginning US oil drilling on the planet Mars by as soon as 2003. He called the energy committee "a crucial part in solving the number-one priority to our nation's welfare. Though the vice-president would never be able to actually go into space himself due to persistent health problems, he did jovially admit, "If I could have the mayonnaise and bacon sandwiches and the moon pants, you bet I'd be in that space shuttle."
However a team of scientists are arguing that Mr. Cheney has grossly missed the point, basing his impulsive announcements on satellite data that only suggests there may be possible pools of open water at the Martian poles....

If you think you can handle the TROOF and would like to read the rest of this smashing report you must go now, immediately, to www.saviorass.com.

Deivid's Thang
- e-mail: deividsthang@saviorass.com
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Comments

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Nothing's Sacred

30.06.2001 15:23

Not content with wreaking environmental destruction on Earth for obscene profits, they want to begin looting and pillaging Mars. I do hope the Martians strongly object.

Bug-Eye


so bush isn't just a pretty face.

30.06.2001 18:00

and to think, the americans say that HE'S the brains behind the operation. if cheney really is that stupid then it could mean what we've all feared! bush is actually in charge of the greatest power on earth! do they still make those mini nuclear bunkers in your backgarden if you ask?

trotsky


Good luck Mr. Cheney

01.07.2001 12:08

I'd like to see NASA drill oil on Mars when it was Bush who cut their budget - his commitment to space is virtually nil. In any case, the latest studies suggest man won't get anywhere near Mars in the next twenty years - unless, of course, the secretive Chinese start a new space race with their rumoured lunar landing programme. No way would Bush take that lying down...

beachcomber


I just might vomit

14.01.2004 17:35

This subject just popped back into the news (Jan. 2004) with Bush's announcement of plans to put a man on mars. Speculation running rampant what he is up to. Why now, during wartime, with no money to blow on symbolic space adventures? It's sickening to think he might be looking for more oil. Literally sickening. I feel ill.

A. Gorilla