Thanks to all the media megahype surrounding the Live8 concerts which took place on 2 July, Seriously has collected enough ludicrous material to fill volumes. Here are some of the highlights:
The Hyde Park venue had a large 'golden circle' of exclusive access to the front area of the stage where the corporate bourgeoisie paid upwards of $1000 for the privilege of drinking champagne and Pimms, while the huddled masses of the pop proletariat in the background were forbidden from drinking alcohol at all.
Pop megastar and multimillionaire Madonna opened her set with a rendition of her hit song 'Music' which fittingly includes the lyric: 'Music makes the bourgeosie and the rebel.' The combined net worth of the pop starts and invited speakers such as Bill Gates is estimated to far exceed the GNP of most African countries.
Meanwhile in Philadelphia, while musicians 'donated their services', many performers received lavish 'gift bags' of branded designer goods such as Gibson giutars, Hugo Boss suits and exclusive fashion accessories, some worth as much as $10,000. None of the items appear to have been fairly traded, sweatshop-free or environmentally friendly.
US artist 50 Cent cancelled appearance at Live8 because it clashed with his acting commitment for the upcoming film Get Rich or Die Tryin'.
The Independent reports that Kadaria Ahmed of the Abuja Enquirer on of Nigeria's biggest weekly papers, was barred from reporting on the event after being told 'papers from G8 nations are a priority'.
Gangstar rapper Snoop Dogg wa a last minute addition to the London Live8 concert after much criticism over the almost all-white lineup. He kept the spirit alive by singing about 'bitches' and 'hoes' and donning a necklace sporting a golden handgun.
African musicians, many of whom dwarf the popularity of some of the minor acts given prominence in the main Live8 events, were controversially relgated to a venue in Cornwall which received almost no mainstream media coverage.
Responding to a criticism, Bob Geldof argued: 'This is cool in terms of pop culture, universal culture. In terms of actual specific cultures, we're not going to have Appalachian music in America; we're not going to have fucking Morris dancing in Britain. The truth is that African kids are listening to 50 [cent] and Eminem and the same as everyone else listens to.'
Pop megastar and multimillionaire Madonna opened her set with a rendition of her hit song 'Music' which fittingly includes the lyric: 'Music makes the bourgeosie and the rebel.' The combined net worth of the pop starts and invited speakers such as Bill Gates is estimated to far exceed the GNP of most African countries.
Meanwhile in Philadelphia, while musicians 'donated their services', many performers received lavish 'gift bags' of branded designer goods such as Gibson giutars, Hugo Boss suits and exclusive fashion accessories, some worth as much as $10,000. None of the items appear to have been fairly traded, sweatshop-free or environmentally friendly.
US artist 50 Cent cancelled appearance at Live8 because it clashed with his acting commitment for the upcoming film Get Rich or Die Tryin'.
The Independent reports that Kadaria Ahmed of the Abuja Enquirer on of Nigeria's biggest weekly papers, was barred from reporting on the event after being told 'papers from G8 nations are a priority'.
Gangstar rapper Snoop Dogg wa a last minute addition to the London Live8 concert after much criticism over the almost all-white lineup. He kept the spirit alive by singing about 'bitches' and 'hoes' and donning a necklace sporting a golden handgun.
African musicians, many of whom dwarf the popularity of some of the minor acts given prominence in the main Live8 events, were controversially relgated to a venue in Cornwall which received almost no mainstream media coverage.
Responding to a criticism, Bob Geldof argued: 'This is cool in terms of pop culture, universal culture. In terms of actual specific cultures, we're not going to have Appalachian music in America; we're not going to have fucking Morris dancing in Britain. The truth is that African kids are listening to 50 [cent] and Eminem and the same as everyone else listens to.'