BREAKING NEWS: - The killjoy "patriots" at the neo-nazi NWI have killed-off one of Britain's most popular seasonal celebrations. Whilst lefties get accused each and every year by the Daily Mail of ending Christmas, lonely fascist rightwingers have well truly cancelled another traditional Christian celebration - St Valentine's Day, out of sheer spite, because so many of them are lonely, sad and unable to hold down relationships. Their Speed Dating event on February the 13th 2016 has thus been shelved through lack of interest, even though Duddyman had promised to be everyone's Eva Braun.
The NWI's speed dating event was billed as "Nazi Love On The Rocks", as crack rather than amphetamines would be the drug of choice. Duddyman was all set to peddle his cheapest, over-contaminated knock-off crack cocaine upon his fellow NWI troops. Lacking in female Hitlerites, Duddy was prepared to offer his body for the lovelorn fascist loners from Lancashire, provided they smoked enough of his his gear, knowing nobody would care less after a few rocks.
It's not just rampant fascist homophobia that vanishes in a crack-smoke haze.... if it wasn't sufficiently shrunk, Duddy had promised to hide his miniscule member tightly between his legs, ladyboy-like, not that anyone would notice either way. It was never that big anyway. Ask his ex who walked out at the first opportunity after discovering she had dated a eunuch when she had hoped for an Enoch.
Sadly, half-cocked Shane Calvert ultimately failed to garnish sufficient interest to help heal the NWI's broken hearts, expecting most if not all of their diminutive little gang to end up alone in intensive care after being remanded in custody in the hospital wing of Dover's local prison, their wee little lumpen anti-refugee "unity protest" this Saturday all-set to descend into lumps of ferocious infighting and arrests galore, as always.