Who Ate All The Pies? Who Told All The Lies?

There has rarely been a time when one or two uniform fetishists on the British fascist Right haven’t clubbed together and pretended to be some form of ‘combat organisation’, giving themselves the trappings of a quasi-terrorist group. Despite the publicity given to these grouplets by the pseudo-antifascist entity ‘Searchlight’, they have generally posed more of a threat to their own members than to anyone else. Little has changed since the days of ‘Column 88’, with a few ageing skinheads currently posing as both the ‘Aryan Strike Force’ and the ‘Racial Volunteer Force’ as an excuse to swagger and posture on the nuttier internet forums the fascist menace inhabit.

The circumstances behind this handful of numbskulls currently being lauded as the “backbone” of ‘white nationalism’ might be considered bizarre in any other walk of life – backbone is something we have rarely seen in evidence among the Fash. As with their forbears on the pantomime fringe of British fascism, the ‘RVF’, and the even more laughable ‘ASF’ (with more initials than members) are far from averse to bullshit and outright lies to court the whoops and back-slaps of their doting compatriots.

In reality, it’s already been a bad year for the Fash, with numerous militant antifascist attacks against them. Recently the ‘British People’s Party’s so-called ‘security team’ got completely turned over by Antifa in London. As usual, much recrimination ensued after the horse had bolted (a very overweight old nag called ‘Sid’ if the metaphor is to be stretched.) “Who will save us from the pesky Reds?” They cried. “We are clueless and gutless to a man (if truth be told.”) Cue bold Sir Adrian Brookes (AKA ‘Kruger’), who certainly looks like he has the arse for a row. Though it’s dwarfed by that of wife Michelle, it might even be big enough to plug the yawning chasm at the centre of Nazi security, that’s if it was matched by a brain one tenth the size.

Brookes may fancy himself as the fuhrer of any tin-pot gang of inbred idiots going, but one only has to look at his track-record within his previous outfit to get a glimpse of the pathetic reality. The short-lived Hitlerite drinking gang, the ‘Wolf’s Hook White Brotherhood’, of which Brookes was leader, could not even get pissed together without their ‘Head of Security’ stabbing the founder of the gang to death.

The latest incarnation of the ‘RVF’, together with the other Laurel & Hardy outfit mentioned above were recently ‘blooded’ in Manchester, when they bravely took on the might of Antifa. Or so they would have their fellow Nazis believe. In reality half a dozen of these dumplings stumbled into a confrontation with a few members of the small and mainly female Manchester branch of the ‘Revolutionary Communist Group’. Despite being outnumbered, we gather that the RCG gave a good account of themselves. As usual, the blustering buffoons of the Right lied through their teeth about what had actually occurred, including claiming they had confronted Antifa, something their gullible fellow-nazis were only too eager to believe.

Soon after, Brookes and his pals ran the ‘security’ for a Leeds get-together of the ailing joke that is the ‘British People’s Party’. A speaker told the assembled dozens that they were damned lucky to have the ‘RVF’ there to protect them against Antifa, claiming to the fools in the audience that 35 ‘Reds’ had threatened to attack the meeting. This blatant lie resulted in Brookes and his crew being heralded as the saviours of British fascism! The reality is that the lunatic fringe of the extreme Right are only ever likely to be a side-order for Antifa, idiots we batter when we’re bored or tired of chasing bigger but more elusive fry. This ‘RVF’/’ASF’ ‘security detail’ are little more than an excuse for a few middle-aged men to dress up in combat fatigues and scam free beer from their even dafter associates. If we ever believed Brookes and his crew posed a serious threat we would simply go round and knock on his door at 58 Cornwall Crescent, Brinington, Stockport, Cheshire, SK5 8HB and have a frank exchange of views.

Since they are unable to make the grade even among the pot-bellied oafs of the BNP ‘security team’, it was inevitable that Brookes and his small crew of misfits would turn up in the political orbit of the ‘British People’s Party’. Riven by a basic political contradiction, this shambolic bunch of near-geriatric Hitler fantacists, have struggled since their inception to decide whether they want to be a gang of terrorists or an electoral party. The problem is largely to do with the makeup of the membership, and particularly that of the leadership. The former are for the most part senile neo-Nazis, shunned even by the BNP and forever wedded to the losing side in World War 2, while the leadership are even more ridiculous. Current fuhrer, on paper at least, is Kevin Watmough, a pathetic individual with no charisma or speaking ability whatsoever, whose influence on the fascist Right, beyond peddling swastikas, has only ever extended to running ‘Redwatch’ and various tawdry internet forums. Even among fellow neo-Nazis he is regarded as a coward and is also strongly rumoured to be a police informer. Alongside Watmough, is veteran fascist and chronic alcoholic Eddy Morrison, whose seen more retirement parties than Saga cruises, and been in and out of the BPP like the hokey-cokey since it was formed. When he’s sober, Eddy can get up and talk bollocks at a meeting, but he’s regarded as unreliable and untrustworthy by many on the fascist Right, not least because of his history as an informer (both to AFA and to the cops.)

Until recently, the dreadful duo of Watmough and Morrison were joined in the BPP leadership by Peter ‘Sid’ Williamson, another almost laughable figure, who could rarely stay sober long enough at BPP meetings to hold a steady knife to a comrade’s throat. Williamson departed with the usual acrimony following the BPP’s recent London humiliation at the hands (and boots) of Antifa.

With so many fragile egos dog-paddling around in such a diminutive puddle of piss, any friendship between the pond life of the RVF and that of the BPP is likely to be short-lived. There has already been tension caused by Brookes’ pal Tommy Williams, of Sheffield, threatening Watmough and Morrison via the internet. Williams, who runs the ‘Covert Undercover Nuisance Tactics’ blogspot, must be a strong contender for the biggest gobshite (and shithouse) in British fascist politics. He famously fell out with Williamson, posting up his home address all over Indymedia, together with numerous ‘trademark’ Photoshop ‘piss-takes’, and threatening to fight him at the BNP’s ‘Red, White & Blue’ knees-up. On the day of reckoning however, both were shown to be the cowards they are, and Williams has now sided with Williamson against Watmough and Morrison. The spat appears to be the usual hot-air from Williams, and Brookes’ apparent ability to help diffuse the row may be one reason Watmough and Morrison are dribbling all over his DM’s. With this bunch of cranks though, it will only be a matter of time before there’s more falling out.

Neither Morrison nor Watmough (who Morrison groomed as a teenager) have ever been able to resist the attraction of rubbing shoulders (and whatever else) with younger men with a fetish for combat clothing and shiny Nazi badges. Like most Nazis they are certainly no strangers to posturing and posing themselves. Some BPP members are so thick or deranged however, that they take Eddy and Kev’s wanking fantasies for reality, two BPP organisers are currently behind bars on terrorism charges. No doubt all the chocolate soldiers of the BPP/RVF/AST or whatever silly name they’re using this week were downing a few pints for their ‘racial comrades’ behind bars both during and after the recent Leeds BPP meeting – Surprising how brave you can be when you’re pissed in the pub isn’t it lads?

The BPP are currently trying to con a large amount of money out of their pitifully small (and just plain pitiful) membership, supposedly to fund candidates in the next General Election. Of course it is very unlikely that they will raise the sum required, meaning that the donations received can make their way into Eddy’s drinking fund and Kev’s Evostik expenditure. In any case, do they really think that people are going to vote for a bunch of Hitler-worshipping would-be terrorists who resemble some of the cast from the film ‘Deliverance’? Eddy Morrison’s previous showing in Leeds’ Bramley ward, when he was caught conning pensioners into signing his nomination papers, suggest the BPP are a very long way from power. And despite their squawkings on fascist internet forums they have no more real presence on the streets than the cartoon Nazis of the ‘RVF’/’AST’. Nor will they have.