They’re ticking of boxes tickety tock with the mechanical precision of a well made clock, the regime is run with rigidity it’s designed for them not designed for me. Statistics are kept and the paperwork done but the receiving end is certainly no fun, complaints are dealt with expertly, to their satisfaction but none for me.

The professionals have worked and so they get paid but I’m not involved in decisions made, “care plans” are done behind my back they are not followed up and no one keeps track. Hidden agendas are all around creating a paranoia breeding ground, I get rejected when I do not act and fulfill my part of an imaginary contract.

I am often told about responsibility and if I ask for help then I’m told it’s “on me”, my needs are not of their concern because ticking of box’s is how they earn. Dictated assistance is what is given from the cold machine that’s statistic driven, I must be “responsible” and do what I’m told but I prefer to rebel because I’ve always been bold.

I’m not told about the game but I’m expected to participate all the same and if I learn the rules and vocabulary, I still won’t win because they choose the referee. Being articulate can make things worse and understanding can become a curse, it doesn’t matter how well I aim they move the target and I lose the game.

If I complain I can not win cause the reply will be false and full of spin, people point out that others are happy but I still say that the systems crappy. I’m not stupid and I’m no fool I can see it’s divide and rule and no matter how hard I articulate I wait for answers and I wait and wait.

Psychology is used to ‘understand’ how to fit me to a plan which is underhand, complication’s of individuality are ignored with cruel inefficiency. The ‘service’ provided works for a those you see, who fit in with the limited ability, of a ‘professionals’ efforts to find out what, which plan works and which does not.

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